Why You Should Keep Having Date Nights No Matter How Long You’ve Been Together
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4 No-Brainer Reasons To Have Regular Date Nights
The dating stages of potential relationships have their ups and downs. It’s the phase where you’re getting to know people and trying to impress them to a certain extent, which is full of the unknown and both good and bad potentialities. To some extent many of us are happy to make it out of the initial dating phase and move into something a little more solid with a person since the commitment makes us feel settled, but too often when we get to that point we end up we end up ditching the courtship dates, and those should never go away. Here’s why you should keep having date nights no matter how long you’ve been together with someone.
To keep you accountable.
One of the biggest issues with long-term relationships losing their steam is that people tend to get comfortable with the fact that no one is going anywhere, which can lead to a bit of slacking in certain ways, if you will. But the truth is that your energy flows where your attention is, and if your attention is not focused on keeping a relationship in a place it can flourish it might not do so much flourishing. We all have our personal ebbs and flows so naturally relationships go through even more of them, but that’s why it’s important to stay accountable regardless of what else is happening in a life.
Keeping up regular date nights is one of those ways that you can remind you and your significant other to stay accountable. No matter what else is happening, staying committed to a date shows a commitment to the relationship, and the nature of a date being of a specific focus on one another can help you keep perspective on the rest of life as well. When you have commitments you show up and do what you need to do, which has a way of keeping us on track. If you were stressed out and didn’t have to be at work you might spend some days worrying on the couch. But you have to go to work, so you do, and then you end up handling whatever was worrying you.
Having dates in the books works in the same way, surely you have other things to be doing but committing to the date keeps you in the moment with a person who you’ve committed to being with, and it will keep reminding you of why.
To have uninterrupted time with one another.
You might hang out all the time, or even live together, but that doesn’t mean that the time you’re spending together is truly focused on one another. Sitting side by side to watch TV is cute and everything, but it doesn’t necessarily encourage those heart to heart talks.
When you’re newly dating someone you spend a lot of time just talking and getting to know one another, but the intention to do that should never end. No matter how well you know a person you can never truly know everything about them, and most of us change and grow constantly as we come upon new challenges and adventures in life, which means there’s always something new to discover about that person.
Keeping the curiosity alive is a powerful tool for connecting and reconnecting over and over. If you reach a point in a relationship where you’re sitting across from her having a drink and don’t have a single thing to say, then perhaps there’s something off in the relationship and that’s okay too. It just serves to highlight that fact and speed up the process of deciding whether things are still going somewhere or not.
It’s a sure way to keep the intimacy.
Keeping intimacy alive in a romantic relationship is what makes a relationship a romantic one as opposed to your other relationships. It’s crucial. You might be able to sustain it in your day-to-day life without having special date nights, but you also might not. It surely can’t help to make the effort in with the intention of focusing on that aspect of the relationship. In fact, bringing novelty into a relationship has been shown to help increase intimacy.
The thing about going out of the house together for a date night is that it feels like an event of some sort, even if it’s as cheap as can be and just down the block. You both have to do get dressed to do it, and there’s a certain type of effort involved that’s a good kind of effort. It shows the other person that you care enough to do it. It might seem like a small token of affection, but sometimes the small things are the things that really make the difference.
Sometimes things feel more meaningful the more mundane that they are. It’s easy to get someone a gift on a holiday, but only people who really care about you remember how you take your coffee and a story about your biggest childhood fear. The small intimate details are the place where intimacy breeds and spreads outward. If it lives on the outer edges only it won’t feel authentic, which is what we feel sometimes when we can’t put our finger on why we don’t feel connected to people despite their awesome behavior that makes us think that we should.
This kind of emotional intimacy of course is a great thing to encourage more of the physical variety. A lot of women enjoy sex more when there’s an emotional connection with someone, which is why many men are careful to keep their emotional distance when they aren’t in the place to be in a relationship. It can get entangled quickly. But when you are in a relationship that emotional connection can be a really good thing. The closeness will make her feel good, and when she feels good about the relationship and your commitment to her, she’ll be extra amped about the bedroom.
Because it’s fun.
Date nights should be one of the most fun things you’ve got going on. It’s a chance to hang out with your love and do something interesting, whether it’s try out a new restaurant or just wander around and explore something that you generally wouldn’t be doing alone. Romance is a very different feeling than the type of feeling that you have when you’re hanging out with your friends, even if you were doing the same thing. Every day of life isn’t always romantic in nature even when you’re madly in love with someone, but that’s why it’s so important to make the choice to cultivate that feeling whenever you can.
Date night helps to foster that sense of “couple” which is important if you want to remain one half of one. It represents the commitment that you share and demonstrates that you’re willing to choose it again and again when there are undoubtedly other options for how you could be choosing to live your life. It says “I still choose you” and also affirms that they’re still choosing you back.