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What do Women Want in the Bedroom?
Men and women tend to have some different perspectives when it comes to all things dating and sex. We’ve rounded up some of the top cited qualities that women find attractive when it comes to sex, and you might be surprised by how they differ from what you previously thought.
10. Someone Who Isn’t Afraid To Go Down on Her
Supposedly there are men out there who have their limits when it comes to what they will and won’t do in the bedroom, and of course no one should ever be forcing you into doing something that you’re not comfortable with. But if you expect to get blowjobs you should expect to be returning the favor. Women often need a bit of extra stimulation and going down on her is the perfect way to do it. Girls tend to like guys who aren’t intimidated by the concept.
9. The Actual Moves
Sex tends to be better when people know what they’re doing logistically, but it’s also possible to alter this pretty quickly. More so than a lot of the other qualities on the list that happen to be more related to personality. It’s super hot when it’s obvious that a guy is familiar with the female anatomy and has an interest in hitting the right spots, but that doesn’t mean that a less experienced person is going to provide a less fun sexual experience. On the contrary, sometimes the exploratory nature of less specific sex has great surprises, just like a super technical romp can feel a little rote or mechanical.
Sex is intense but it’s also totally hilarious in certain ways, and remembering that can go a long way in keeping the mood relaxed and fun. Playfulness in the bedroom can totally open up the lines of communication and make it easier to introduce new stuff into the mix. Sweep her off her feet and carry her up the stairs for once, laugh when things could otherwise be seen as awkward. The more relaxed people are in the bedroom the more comfortable they are, which usually makes things go better for both people.
Confidence is important in any circumstance when you want to be perceived as desirable, but it isn’t the end all be all. Some people are confident but totally selfish which makes sex feel like a one-way show. Or like there’s a camera hidden in the room somewhere and this guy is trying to put on a show or something. But truthfully if we like a guy who isn’t the most confident guy in the world that isn’t necessarily a mood killer either. It can actually be sort of sweet. If it’s obvious that you turn a little bashful and shy around us that’s flattering…as long as you can push through it enough to actually make a move. We love when you make the move.
We all have our favorite moves and positions, but we also love it when the person we’re sleeping with surprises us with something new. For some people this is more dramatic than others, but even seducing her in a different room of the house can spice things up a bit. We don’t want to be hit with moves so crazy that we’re left wondering if you’re secretly a porn star, but we do like to feel like you’re so inspired and excited to be with us that new ways to get down are popping up. Even if we’re not coming up with new moves that doesn’t mean we aren’t totally open to them from you.
Good communication makes everything better in relationships, whether that’s choosing somewhere to eat with a long term girlfriend or choosing who’s place to head back to on a first date. It also helps a lot in the bedroom. Like a lot. Sometimes you find people who you’re incredibly synced with sexually and there isn’t the need for a ton of actual chatting during the act, but even the best-matched partners could use some communication here and there.
There are all different kinds of communication verbal and nonverbal, so it should be pretty easy to explain what you like and don’t like even if you’re not exactly saying it. Things can get weird when it’s not going great but no one is stepping up to make a note on what could be better. Women like when guys are appreciative of them in bed, so make it known.
4. Great Kissing
Kisses go a long way in the bedroom and without. A lot of women like to start the foreplay action way before they hit the bedroom and kissing one way that you can do that. A great purposeful kiss can be extremely hot, and since the act is sort of intimate it’s also a bit of a confidence booster. Don’t wait until you get in the bedroom to let her know that you’re attracted to her, make sure that she’s aware of it as soon as you’re feeling it. You can be sure that if you do that by the time the clothes comes off things will move along a lot faster. Many of us also love to be kissed during sex, don’t deny us that simple pleasure.
3. Generosity and Intention
Let’s be honest, we’re all perfectly capable of having sex with ourselves and while it’s not exactly the same it can be pretty efficient. If you’re going to go through all the trouble of doing it with another person it might as well be as awesome for both people as possible, and that means being generous in bed as opposed to self involved. It’s no secret that women can require a little extra attention both to heat up and to reach the finish line, and it’s appealing when men are aware of that and also care to remedy it. Sex can be great even without an orgasm, but it’s not so great when there isn’t any effort involved. At least try. Otherwise your green light to the bedroom might turn to an abrupt red. No matter how hot you are.
Many women tend to be emotional creatures, we like to connect to people and we feel different things when we do. Not everyone is looking for the love of their life when they set out to get some, but most people do want to feel like they’re at least on the same planet as the person they’re in bed with. Disconnected sex isn’t real satisfying, we might as well be sleeping with a robot. When you find those girls that aren’t interested in casual stuff that’s not necessarily because they have anything against it logistically or morally, they just maybe don’t get as turned on when it’s a random guy. Some connection is just an unspoken vibe between people, are other aspects of it have to do with behavior. Some women for example, will really appreciate some eye contact during the act.
More than anything that you could do in the bedroom respect is important. Even if you’re engaging in some sex play that doesn’t look respectful, at the core it should be. There’s obviously a big difference between playing and actually hurting people. Sex is different for every woman and sometimes there are certain moves that don’t work for her anatomy. Listen and adjust if she asks you to. Sex is an intimate act whether you like it or not, which means that it can make people feel vulnerable in both good and bad ways. It opens stuff up literally and figuratively. The varying intensity of that is what makes it possible for things to turn sour pretty quickly, or for good sex to turn into mind-blowing sex.